07.Here's to a Long and Unhappy Life

Lesson 07

Text A

Here's to a Long and Unhappy Life VOCABULARY ITEMS

1. longevity: n. the property of being long-lived长寿，长命；持久

2. philanderer: n. a man who likes many women and has short sexual relationships with them爱和女人调情的男人，玩弄女性的男人

3. mortality: n. the quality or state of being mortal必死性

4. widowed: ad]. single because of death of the spouse成为寡妇的；成了鳄夫的

5. nana: n. grandmother or baby nurse 外婆；祖母；保姆

6. diabetes: n. a medical condition in which someone has too much sugar in the blood【医】糖尿病

7. diaper: n. a piece of towel or paper worn by infants to catch excrement尿布

8. chronic: ad]. being long-lasting and recurrent or characterized by long suffering长期患病的；长期的；慢性的；难以治愈（或根除）的

9. spry: adj. moving quickly and lightly（指老年人）活跃的，敏捷的

10.perpetually: adv. seemingly uninterrupted; everlastingly; for all time永恒地；终身地；不断地

11. churlish: adj. rude and boorish; having a bad disposition脾气坏的；吝音的；无礼的

12. bitch: (1)vt. to complain埋怨，抱怨;

(2) n. a spiteful woman恶毒的女人，泼妇

13. sullenly: adv. silently showing dislike, lack of cheerfulness and interest; darkly and unpleasantly不高兴地；绷着脸；忧郁地

14. bawling: adj. with loud cries made while weeping爱叫骂的；大喊大叫的

15. withered: adj. weak and dried凋败了的；枯萎的，干瘪的；（手等）尽是皱纹的

16. tepid: adj. moderately warm微温的，不冷不热的

17.harrowing: adj. extremely upsetting or disturbing痛心的，悲惨的

18. Pollyanna: n. a person who is over optimistic盲目乐观的人

19.spar: v. to bandy words in argument; dispute争论，争吵

20. treacly: adj. overly sweet甜蜜的，像糖蜜的，如糖蜜一样甜的

21. agitate: to upset; disturb使不安；使焦虑

22. woefully: adv. in an unfortunate or deplorable manner悲哀地；令人遗憾地

23. coincidence: n. an event that might have been arranged although it was really accidental（令人吃惊的）巧合，巧事

24. deflate: to make someone feel less important or less confident挫败（某人的）

锐气，使……泄气

25. bleak: adj. offering little or no hope; unpleasantly cold and damp阴冷的；阴郁的，凄凉的；没有希望的

26. blinds: n. window curtain窗帘；百叶窗

27. fluff: v. to make fluffy使松软

28. musty: ad]. covered with or smelling of mold发霉的，陈腐的

29. elegant: ad]. refined and tasteful in appearance or behavior or style（人或其举止）优美的，文雅的；漂亮的

30. whiny: adj. habitually complaining 好发牢骚的，嘀咕不停的，烦躁的

31. superbly: adv. extremely well庄重地；华美地；极好地；上等地

32. stamina: n. enduring strength and energy体力，耐力，持久力

33. repel: vt. to cause to move back by force or influence击退，抵制；使厌恶，使反感；排斥；相斥

34. fragile: adj. easily broken or

damaged or destroyed易碎的，脆的；虚弱的，脆弱的；经不起折腾的

35. sulk: to be in a huff and display one's displeasure生闷气；温怒

36. cajole: vt. to influence or urge by gentle urging, caressing, or flattering（用甜言蜜语、虚假诺言等）劝诱，哄骗，勾引

37.assuage: vt. to cause to be more favorably inclined; gain the good will of减轻；缓和；平息

38. tiptoe: v. to walk on one's toes用脚尖站立（或走路）；踞起脚尖

39. quarry: n. a person who is the aim of an attack (especially a victim of ridicule or exploitation) by some hostile person or influence被追逐的目标

40.stoic: adj. seeming unaffected by pleasure or pain; impassive坚忍的；苦修的

41. intrepid: adj. invulnerable to fear or intimidation无畏的；勇敢的

42. mirth: n. great merriment（书）欢乐；欢笑

43. thirtysomething: n. over 30 years old三十多岁

44. eightysomething: n. over 80 years old八十多岁

45.hatchet: n. a short ax used to chop wood短柄小斧

46. villa: n. detached or semi-detached suburban house; pretentious and luxurious country residence with extensive ground （英）（城郊）住宅；别墅，公馆

47. skorts: n. cross between a skirt and shorts（女用）裙式短裤

48. ratty: adj. dirty and in bad condition ＜理＞破烂的；易怒的

49. crabgrass: n. grasses with creeping stems that root freely; a pest in lawns一种杂草

50. raccoon: n. an omnivorous nocturnal mammal native to North人merica and Central America洗熊

51. yoga: n. a system of exercises practiced as part of the Hindu discipline to promote control of the bo即and mind瑜伽

52. ball up: to make a mess of, destroy or ruin滚成球；团成球毁掉

53. tune out: to turn off; ignore or not respond to关掉；不理；对……无反应

54. wind up: to finally be or do something以……告终（或终结）

55. throw up: to eject the contents of the stomach through the mouth; vomit呕吐

56. hit the snooze: to go to bed睡觉

57. hit the bottle: to drink alcohol to the point of intoxication; acquire and drink alcohol, usually beer喝酒买醉

58. hit the skids: to rapidly slow down or stop a moving vehicle by mashing down the brake pedal; halt whatever action or process is currently occurring刹车

59. under rug: nothing hiding

nothing不用隐藏任何东西

60. embark on: to get off the ground; start从事，着手

61. prop up: to support, or prevent from falling, with or as if with a prop (often followed by up）支持，资助

62. lazy ass: a man that stays home and plays computer games all day待在家玩计算机的宅男

NOTES

1. Energizer Bunny: Someone who will never quit trying. They won't give up. Much like the Energizer Battery's Mascot, they just keep going and going and going and going…美国劲霸电池广告中装了劲霸电池的玩具兔子，当别的兔子都不动了，它还在一边敲鼓一边跳着。

2. supporting hose: a pair of hoses with steel support老年人穿的带支架的护腿

3. The Corrections: The Corrections

is a 2001 novel by American author Jonathan Franzen. It revolves around the troubles of an elderly Midwestern couple and their three adult children, tracing their lives from the mid-twentieth century to "one last Christmas" together near the turn of the millennium. The novel was awarded the National Book Award in 2001 and the James Tait Black Memorial Prize in 2002.

4. The House of Mirth: The House of Mirth (1905) is a novel by Edith Wharton. It is about a woman who risks losing her chance of happiness with the only man she has ever loved. First published in 1905, the novel is Wharton's first important work of fiction, sold 140,000 copies between October and the end of December, and added to Wharton's existing fortune. Although The House of Mirth is written in the style of a novel of manners, set against the backdrop of the 1 890s New York ruling class, it is a text considered to be

part of American literary.

5. beta blocker: Beta blockers (sometimes written as 3-blockers) or beta-adrenergic blocking agents, beta-adrenergic antagonists, or beta antagonists, are a class of drugs used for various indications. They are contraindicative to patients with asthma as stated in the BNF 2011. They are particularly for the management of cardiac arrhythmias, cardio-protection after heart attack, and hypertension.受体阻滞剂（一种缓解心动过速的药）

6. skort: A skirty sort of shorts. Something that appears to be a skirt of knee-length or shorter, but which includes an integral boxer-like lining of shorts to protect the modesty of the wearer. The term can be either singular or plural when referring to a single item of this clothing. Skorts are a common feature of girls' school uniforms, for elementary and

middle school children, but rare outside that setting.（女用）裙式短裤

Text A

Here's to a Long and Unhappy Life

Lisa Gabriele

[1] Last week, a bunch of people forwarded to me a copy of a stu町done on older women and longevity. It found that those who were mildly, though markedly, depressed tended to live longer. Big surprise, I thought, tossing the balled-up clipping over my shoulder. That's up there with "money eases stress", "liars make good writers" and "philanderers make even better liars". (On the other hand, researchers found that depression had no influence on the mortality of men. That's because when asked "So, what's wrong?" all the men circled "Nothing", really, really hard.)

[2] Most of us know an old aunt, a

lonely grandmother, or a widowed neighbor-lady who's a little depressed about life. Maybe we'd spend more time with them if they'd just stop complaining about their backs, the noise, their pensions, the pollution, all these foreigners. Sometimes we tune out their depression, thinking, I cannot believe she is still around, this Energizer Bunny in support hose.

[3] My own nana finally died after suffering for decades from strokes and diabetes. For the last 10 years of her life, she sat paralyzed in an adult diaper on the chronic-care floor of an excellent hospital. She was almost 100 years old, and for most of this century, she was pretty much happy about pretty much nothing. My spry, perpetually young mother visited her often, more often than we did, her churlish grandkids. Poor Nana bitched constantly, and sank sullenly into her own shoulders

every time we asked her how she was doing. Terrible, she'd say. How do you think I'm doing?

[4] Who can blame her? Two World Wars, the Depression, a long marriage to a difficult man, children accidentally born to her in her forties, during the Forties. At the end of her harrowing life, to wind up sharing a room with bawling strangers, baring her withered body to impatient nurses for tepid sponge baths would render any Pollyanna somewhat depressed, no?

[5] But we all agreed that sparring with us, and nurses, kept Nana alert, treacly soap operas kept her agitated, and the absence of her ungrateful, lazy grandkids kept her permanently dissatisfied. Things that caused her to sigh heavily depressed her, yes, but they also kept her willfully (woefully) alive.

[6] When my mother would return from one of her exhausting visits, she'd

always say she never, ever wanted to grow old like Nana. Last year, she sadly got her wish, far too soon, living just over half as long as the woman who bore her.

[7] It is no coincidence that my mother worked as a private, uncomplaining nurse for old, depressive ladies. But she loved her job, loved caring for those sick, deflated people, loved making their grey, bleak lives a little cheerier. She'd throw up their dusty blinds, fluff their musty pillows, serve their canned fruit cocktail, read to them, iron for them, and try her best to cheer them up. Her last client, an elegant, whiny, rich lady, still alive in her early nineties, did not send flowers to my mother's funeral. My mother was devoted to this woman, so my nickname for her became "That Miserable Old Bitch".

[8] In The Corrections, author Jonathan Franzen superbly captures the stamina of these mildly depressed old

ladies. His main character, Enid Lambert, suffers from a depression that acts as a kind of invisible force field, unconsciously repelling everyone away from her fragile core. Enid complains and sulks, manipulates and cajoles, in order to assuage her fundamental dissatisfaction. Many chapters later, most around her fall like diseased trees. Enid, however, picks up her skirts, and tiptoes around the proverbial corpses. Enid survives—thrives even. She remains intact because her depression protects her from ever truly suffering, the way those around her must. What doesn't kill you, it seems, moves on to more stubborn quarry..

[9] Contrast Enid with young Lily Bart from Edith Wharton's House of Mirth. Lily is stoic, idealistic, and intrepid. She complains about nothing and accepts her lot in life as fate. Lily dies broke and alone at thirtysomething. If only she could have

collapsed into her sadness, she might have died broke and alone at eightysomething.

[10] So, hit the snooze, the bottle or the skids. Resume bitching, chin down, carry the hatchet, under rug nothing. Life is hard and then you... sigh. Heavily. And frankly, this comes as a relief to me. I've never pictured myself living in a candy-coloured retirement villa, wearing skorts, cheerfully participating in activities, embarking on a late-in-life spiritual awakening. I always saw myself in a ratty lawn chair, frowning amidst overgrown crabgrass, a small rifle propped up against the armrest to keep raccoons away from my sweet, old cats. I am possibly chewing tobacco, and complaining, to my grown daughter, or her husband, or whoever the hell picked up the phone, about my own lazy-ass husband, or whoever the hell's making all that bloody noise down in the basement. So goodbye beta blockers,

nicotine gum, and yoga. This the first day of the rest of my miserable, long, life.

(835 words) ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Lisa Gabriele is the author of the critically acclaimed bestsellers Tempting Faith DiNapoli and The Almost Archer Sisters. Both books have been published internationally. Her essays and fiction have appeared in The Best American Nonrequired Reading Series, the New York Times Magazine, The Washington Post, Vice magazine, Salon, Glamour, and Babble, and she's a regular contributor to Nerve. She's from Belle River, Ontario, and has lived in Dawson City, Buenos Aires, New York City, and Washington, D.C. She's also the senior producer on CBC TV's Dragons 'Den.

EXERCISES

I. Reading Comprehension

A. Answer the following questions or complete the following statements.

1. Which sentence best expresses the main point of this selection?

A. Mild depression seems to distract women from life-shortening stresses.

B. As grandmothers have led very hard lives, they have reason to complain.

C. Caring for an elderly parent is dangerously stressful.

D. Depression is not as dangerous or serious as people believe it to be.

2. The author suggests that complaining elders _____.

A. should be dealt with by tuning them out

B. tend to be unpleasant to visit

C. are sad and lonely

D. all talk about the same things

3. The main problem that the author's grandmother endured was _____.

A. the poor quality of the care facility where she lived

B. that her children and grandchildren seldom visited her

C. that the nurses of the hospital were always impatient

D. that she suffered from serious diseases and was paralyzed

4. The author feels that her grandmother _____.

A. had a loving family and no real reason to be depressed

B. was depressed because she did not live with her family

C. was depressed because she had to share a room with a stranger

D. had led a difficult life whose circumstances were depressing

5. We can conclude that the author's mother _____.

A. worked hard and endured the same type of stress that the grandmother avoided

B. was a saint who selflessly sacrificed herself for her own mother

C. did a demanding and draining job because she had a death wish

D. was treated badly by all her elderly patients

6. The author called her mother's last client "That Miserable Old Bitch", because _____.

A. the old lady was too miserly

B. her mother didn't like the old lady

C. the old lady was emotionless

D. she hated rich people

7. We can infer from most of the examples provided by the author that _____.

A. women work far harder than people realize

B. caring for others leads to fulfillment in life

C. only the good people die young

D. suppressing strong emotions is