老友记中英文本及笔记

The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot)

the pilot:美国电视剧新剧开播都会有一个试播来测试观众对新剧的接受程度，以此来决定是否再继续播下去，也可以说是一个开端，第一集试播

Written by: Marta Kauffman and David Crane

Transcribed by: guineapig

Additional transcribing by: Eric Aasen (Note: The previously unseen parts of this episode are shown in blue text.)

101 试播

瑞秋在教堂抛弃未婚夫巴利、逃婚到莫妮卡处。

莫妮卡和调酒师保罗约会，此君伪装成离婚后一蹶不振的苦命人，靠博取同情来骗女人上床。

罗斯婚姻失败，情绪低落。

乔伊安慰他说，女性的种类与冰激凌的品种一样多，离婚未尝不是好事。

大家一同看西班牙肥皂剧并信口瞎猜剧情。

罗斯自高中起即爱慕瑞秋，此刻死灰复燃，提议和她约会，瑞秋答应了

1.01 Pilot

Rachel leaves Barry at the alter and moves in with Monica.

Monica goes on a date with Paul the wine guy, who turns out to be less than sincere.

Ross is depressed about his failed marriage.

Joey compares women to ice cream.

Everyone watches Spanish soaps.

Ross reveals his high school crush on Rachel.[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]

Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!

Joey: C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!

go out with <俚>约会

Chandler: So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?

hump n.驼背/hairpiece：false hair;wig n.假发/这是Chandler挖苦Paul的话，意思是：他有驼背么？有假发的秃子？

Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?

(They all stare, bemused.)

bemused: puzzled adj.困惑的发呆的

Phoebe: Just 'cause I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!

Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.

Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.

[Time Lapse]

lapse v.(时间)流逝

Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally…naked.

naked adj.赤裸的

All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.

Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone... there.

Joey: Instead of...?

Chandler: That's right.

Joey: Never had that dream.

Phoebe: No.

Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring，and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!

all of a sudden adv.突然/weird adj.离奇的，古怪的/I figured I?d better answer it, and it turns out it?s my mother, which is very very weird: I suppose these three bold(adj.粗体的) denoted(adj.表示的) words are most frequently used in each episode.

[Time Lapse, Ross has entered.]

Ross: (mortified) Hi.

mortified adj.受羞辱的窘迫的/mortify v.使感屈辱使失面子使羞愧[eg:The teacher was mortified by his own inability to answer such a simple question]

Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.

Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?

Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...

intestine n.肠

Chandler: Cookie?

Monica: (explaining to the others) Carol moved her stuff out today.

Joey: Ohh.

Monica: (to Ross) Let me get you some coffee.

Ross: Thanks.

Phoebe: Ooh! Oh! (She starts to pluck at the air just in front of Ross.)

pluck v.拔去(鸡鸭等)毛扯拉[eg:He plucked the letter from her hands]/pluck at：To remove abruptly(adv.唐突地) or forcibly(adv.强制地)

Ross: No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay? I'll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.

aura：a distinctive atmosphere surrounding a given source n.气氛灵气光环[eg: the place had an aura of mystery]/当时的场景是Ross进来跟大家诉说他的不幸婚姻，倒了霉运的他周身象是鬼神附身一般。Phoebe 这人第一喜欢帮助人，第二她总是神叨叨的，大家还记得有一集里她看到一只猫，就说是她死去的妈吗？于是Phoebe想帮Ross把霉运赶走，PhD Ross 自然是反对封建迷信的，就对Phoebe说，意思是你别烦我了，省省吧。

Ross: Monica: No you don't.

Ross: No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!

to hell with<口>让...见鬼去去她该死的

Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian...

Ross: No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn't know, how should I know?

fixate on: to focus one?s gaze or attention o n sth v.关注某事

Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian... (They all stare at him.) Did I say that out loud?

Joey: Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot of pain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?

(Ross gestures his consent.)

consent vi.同意赞成

Joey: Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have some hormones.

strip v.剥去/joint：place通常指不那么高雅的地方/Strip joint: A nightclub(n.夜总会) or other establishment where striptease(n.脱衣舞) is performed n.脱衣舞酒吧/hormone n. 荷尔蒙激素

Ross: I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!

(Rachel enters in a wet wedding dress and starts to search the room.)

Chandler: And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)

Monica: Rachel?!

Rachel: Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!

Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?

Monica: (pointing at Rachel) De-caff. (to All) Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. (to Rachel) This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross?

De－caff是不含咖啡因的咖啡。当时Rach进来的时候很激动，Mon就让咖啡店的小姐给她一杯这样的咖啡，免得她更激动。

Rachel: Sure!

Ross: Hi.

(They go to hug but Ross's umbrella opens. He sits back down defeated again.A moment of silence follows as Rachel sits and the others expect her to explain.)

Monica: So you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?

bridemaid n.女傧相/再过一会儿就会有四个被淋湿的伴娘来找Rachel. Monica 拿这个来开玩笑

Rachel: Oh God... well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in this room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden- (to the waitress that brought her coffee)Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew looked familiar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. (to Monica) So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city.

gravy n.肉汁/Gravy boat: An elongated, boat-shaped pitcher used to serve gravy. A gravy boat usually sits on a matching plate, which is used to catch gravy drips. Sometimes the plate is permanently attached to the pitcher. A matching ladle often accompanies a gravy boat. Also called sauce boat. 船行卤肉盘

sweet'n'low 低脂糖：Low in fat, sugar alternative to ordinary sweets

/ Mr. Potato Head 瑞秋和众人谈到了她逃婚的原因，她说这是因为她突然发现她的未婚夫巴里医生长得活像“薯头先生(Mr．Potato Head)”，这是在美国家喻户晓的卡通人物。如果大家看过《玩具总动员(Toy Story)》，就会在里面发现他和他的夫人“薯头太太(Mrs．Potato Head)”叽叽歪歪，经常批评这、批评那的形象。尽管“薯头先生”很可爱，但卡通毕竟是卡通，

如果你在乎未婚夫的容貌，而未婚夫又不幸长得和“薯头先生”一副嘴脸，你最好还是和瑞秋一样赶紧逃婚。

gorgeous adj.华丽的，灿烂的，极好的/ turn on a.打开(turn on the radio)b.指让某人更兴奋激动or引起人的性兴奋(wow,the gal really turns me on)/freak out a.have an extreme reaction to sth吓坏了b.act abnormally (under the influence of drugs) 举止异常c.make sb feel extreme plaesure or unease焦躁害怕不安/drift apart a.感情疏远b.(两者)漂移/turn on :if someone or something turns you on, that means they make you interested or excited, the opposite is turn off/freak out means you suddenly behave in a very strange and uncontrolled way; Potato  head  is  a  kind  of  funny face toy popular among children in US //I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart: lose person contact over time

Monica: Who wasn't invited to the wedding.

Rachel: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue.

[Scene: Monica's Apartment, everyone is there and watching a Spanish Soap on TV and are trying to figure out what is going on.]

Monica: Now I'm guessing that he bought her the big pipe organ, and she's really not happy about it.

pipe organ n.管风琴

Rachel: (on phone) Daddy, I just... I can't marry him! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me!

matter vi.有关系要紧

(The scene on TV has changed to show two women, one is holding her hair.)

Chandler: (re TV) Ooh, she should not be wearing those pants.

Joey: I say push her down the stairs.

Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey:  Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!

(She is pushed down the stairs and everyone cheers.)

Rachel: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it's like, all of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!

metaphor:analogy n.隐喻类比/I?m not saying I want you to buy me a hat, it?s a metaphor: shoe 就是鞋子的意思。下文"it's a metaphor"，是个比喻！Rachel喜欢购物嘛，所以把服饰比喻成人的理想，别人告诉rachel要成为一只鞋，rachel自己想做个"purse" 以鞋喻人生,职业、前途或者某一类人。老爸老妈希望Rachel成为某一种人，Rachel自己却另有想法。只不过Rachel想不到用什么比喻，所以用自己最喜欢的服饰作比喻。Rachel喜欢逛街购物嘛.Shoe和Purse都是ladies的最爱。shoe是指要成双配对的生活，因为shoes是2只一起的，一只shoe永远需要另外一只。purse就是独立的，自己可以生存的，不需要配对的。

Ross: You can see where he'd have trouble.

You can see where he'd have trouble:Apparently, we can tell that Rach's dad made fun of Rach's metaphor by saying "buy her a hat", and pretended that he didn't know what Rach was talking about. But what's even worse is that Rach didn't get her dad's little trick either.So she yelled at the phone that "It's a metaphor,Daddy!". Once she realized how rude and unladily she

was just now, her eyes met with Ross's, which made Ross rather embarrassing. So he ended up saying that "You can see where he'd have trouble." That means "you can see misunderstanding your metaphor is where he'd have trouble to communicate with you smoothly. /Are you in trouble 又有很棒的sex，又有feelings，必然心情异常激动，所以rach说：你还能挺住吗？

Rachel: Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica.

Monica: Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...

Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica：Monica has no idea why Rachel said that. But she can't just abandon Rach at this critical time, so when her friends turned to her for a verification, she can't think of nothing to say except that: "Well, it seems to Rachel that I have already agreed on the whole moving in thing( that is established an agreement on her moving in), although I have nothing to do with it!!(Don't look at me in this weird way, guys!)"

Rachel: Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybe I don't need your money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!

Rachel逃婚之后就不得不面对后果了她的老爸很生气，在电话里威胁说要经济制裁她，Rachel一时嘴硬说："Well, maybe I don't need your money." 等她老爸真的把电话挂了之后，她又忙不迭地对着电话叫道："Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!"事已至此她只能借住在Monica的家里了。

[Time Lapse, Rachel is breathing into a paper bag.]

Monica: Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just try to think of nice calm things... Phoebe: (sings) Raindrops on roses and rabbits and kittens小猫, (Rachel and Monica turn to look at her.) bluebells 野风信子and sleighbells雪橇and- something with mittens棒球or拳击手套... La la la la...something and noodles with string.  These are a few...

Rachel: I'm all better now.

Phoebe: (grins and walks to the kitchen and says to Chandler and Joey.) I helped!

grin n.露齿笑, 裂口笑v.露齿而笑

Monica: Okay, look, this is probably for the best, y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life.  The whole, 'hat' thing.

在这些事发生之前，Rachel可是一直靠在她那有钱的老爸身上的，所以Monica 才说：”哎，这可能是件好事呢，你想啊，这样你就能独立生活了。” be for the best 是一个极其口语化的表达法，表示某件事情可能并不像看上去那么糟，也颇有点良药虽苦，其利于病的意思，比如：I know it's hard for you to leave him, but it's for the best.

Joey: (comforting her) And hey, you need anything, you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.

接着号称情圣的Joey也跑来向Rachel表示："嗨，如果你需要什么尽管来找我好了。" 实际上Joey和另一个"老友" Chandler就住在Monica的对门：Me and Chandler live right across the hall. 按语法讲，Joey应该说Chandler and I…但在口语中用me也是可以接受的，而且Joey为了突出自己而把Me放到了Chandler前面，然后还很暧昧地加了一句"他经常不在家(And he?s away lot)"。

Monica: Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her wedding day!

Monica很了解Joey, 教训他说："你别挑逗她了(stop hitting on her)，今天可是她的结婚之日。" 而这里的hit on someone 的意思是"和某人调情，或挑逗某人", 相当于flirt with someone,作个小小的总结：hit on someone/flirt with someone/ to make a pass at someone/ to come on to someone 例如："Did you see the way Brian came on to Sally at the office party?"/"Oh, Brian has made a pass at every girl in the office."/"I know, but he hit on Sally

particularly hard." /Joey, stop hitting on her! : Slang, to pay unsolicited(adj.主动提供的) and usually unwanted(adj.不必要的) sexual attention to

注意：Hit on sb. /come on to sb./pass at sb./crash on sb: 指的是对某人有意思，有好感（情感上或“生理”上），不一定（只是不一定要付诸行动），即“被某人所吸引”；flirt with sb包括付诸行动，比如我们常说的“上前搭讪，引人注意，挑逗，调情”。当然具体到实际生活中两种情况有可能交叉，比如上文中翻译的“你别挑逗她了”就包含了这两种意思，非常准确。

Joey: What, like there's a rule or something?

到底是情圣啊! 最后Joey脸不红心不跳地回了一句："怎么啦？难道还有什么明文规定不成？（What, like there's a rule or something?）。似乎该理解为难道有什么规定（在这种情况下禁止我追求她）么？

注意：“迷恋上……，爱上……”的几种说法：have the hots for someone/be stuck on someone/have one's cap set for someone/fall for

(The door buzzer sounds and Chandler gets it.)

buzzer n.蜂鸣器

Chandler: Please don't do that again, it's a horrible sound.

Paul: (over the intercom) It's, uh, it's Paul.

over the intercom: communication system linking different rooms

Monica: Oh God, is it 6:30?  Buzz him in让他进来!

Buzz him in：buzz就是按楼房的防盗门时发出的声音，这样用法又简单，又形象/Buzz him in: make a signal using the buzzer to let him in

Joey: Who's Paul?

Ross: Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?

Monica: Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a real date' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?

Ross: He finally asked you out?

Monica: Yes!

Chandler: Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.

this is a Dear Diary moment:西方人写日记一开头总爱写Dear Diary,...... Dear Diary moment也许是讲这个时刻不同寻常，有重要意义，值得写进日记的意思吧。这是一个值得纪念的日子/时刻”的意思。/ohh, this is a Dear Diary moment: when Americans keep the diary(n.日记), normally, the first words they write down must be “Dear Diary”, apparently, Chandler mocks Monica that she is so attracted to Paul with his stereotyped(adj.套用老调的) Chandler sarcastic tone.

Monica: Rach, wait, I can cancel...

Rachel: Please, no, go, that'd be fine!

Monica: (to Ross) Are, are you okay? I mean, do you want me to stay?

Ross: (choked voice) That'd be good...

Choke v.阻塞

Monica: (horrified) Really?

horrified adj.惊骇的

Ross: (normal voice) No, go on! It's Paul the Wine Guy!

Phoebe: What does that mean?   Does he sell it, drink it, or just complain a lot? (Chandler doesn't know.)

(There's a knock on the door and it's Paul.)

Monica: Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. (They are all lined up next to the door.)... everybody,

everybody, this is Paul.

line up v.整队, 排列起

All: Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!

Chandler: I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?

I didn?t catch your name: perceive(v.意识到) by hearing

Monica: Okay, umm-umm, I'll just--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...

Ross: A wandering?

Monica: Change!  Okay, sit down. (Shows Paul in) Two seconds.

Phoebe: Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.

eyelash n.睫毛/I just pull out four eyelashes: the fringe of hair edging the eyelid(n.眼睑). Usually used in plural(adj.复数的)

(Monica goes to change换衣服.)

Ross: So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you up to tonight?

what are you up to tonight? : Busy or occupied with

Rachel: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!

be headed for v.朝……方向去，前往

Ross: Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.

Lizard n.蜥蜴

Rachel说度蜜月到Aruba,为什么Ross提到Big lizards.当Rach提到本想去Aruba时，Ross原本想说Rach不能去渡蜜月是太遗憾了，但突然意识到不应该说这些，急忙改口找些其他话题而提到Big lizards，并不是Ross对生物感兴趣。我认为到底Aruba有没有Big lizards 无关紧要，只是Ross转换话题的一个借口而已

Chandler: (deadpan) Yes, and we're very excited about it.

deadpan n.无表情的脸/Deadpan: a completely expressionless face

Rachel: Well actually thanks, but I think I'm just gonna hang out here tonight.  It's been kinda a long day.

hang out here：呆在这儿。朋友之间相处，象FRIENDS他们一起喝咖啡，在MON家聊天之类的，都是hang out。像这样的词组就是所谓的:外国人不认为是俚语的俚语，它们非常通俗，老外每天都在说，而我们在字典上却查不到确切含义。因此，看FRIENDS是很有帮助的。

it' been kinda a long day：完成时态，因为RACH又逃婚，有被老爸骂，这一天过得很痛苦，所以也就很漫长

Ross: Okay, sure.

Joey: Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?

Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.

Commercial Break

[Scene: Ross's Apartment, the guys are there assembling furniture.]

Ross: (squatting and reading the instructions) I'm supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whom guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs腿麻掉了.

squat v.a.蹲坐b.非法占用/brackety n.托架/ bracket thin是组装家具的支架之类的东西/a bunch of 一窜，一束/worm n. 蜗杆是一种类似起锚器或绞盘的东西，用于把比较重的物品

提起来/worm guy指代螺丝钉，因为螺丝钉上的纹路与worm很相似/whatsoever pron.无论什么/I?m supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys:brackety means an L-shaped support projecting(adj.突出的) from a wall (as to hold a shelf); side means an extended outer surface of an object; worm means screw thread螺纹on a gear with(v.一致) the teeth of a worm wheel(n.蜗轮) or rack(n.架); while, a bunch of means a group of (Joey and Chandler are finishing assembling the bookcase书架，书柜.)

Joey: (picking up a leftover part) What's this?

leftover n.剩余物, 残留物, 剩菜adj.剩余的

Chandler: I have no idea.

(Joey checks that Ross is not looking and dumps it in a plant.)

Joey: Done with the bookcase!

Done with the bookcase: complete

Chandler: All finished!

Ross: (clutching a beer can and sniffing) This was Carol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.

cluth v.抓住, 攫住n.离合器/sniff v.用力吸, 嗅, 闻到/out of the can(n.罐头)指一直用杯子来喝

Joey: Ross, let me ask you a question. She got the furniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?

stereo n. 音响

Ross: You guys.

Chandler: Oh, God.

Joey: You got screwed你受骗了.强调钱财方面，即“被别人以不正当的手段骗取钱财”

you got screwed: to cheat or deceive someone

Chandler: Oh my God!

[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are eating.]

Monica: Oh my God!

Paul: I know, I know, I'm such an idiot. I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. I mean, how clean can teeth get?

catch on v.抓牢, 理解, 流行/I guess I should have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week, I mean how clean can teeth get? : caught on :Understand clearly, comprehend. Catch on to the fact is also a useful alternative phase you can apply to Monica: My brother's going through that right now, he's such a mess. How did you get through it?

my brother?s going through that right now, he?s such a mess: informal terms for a difficult situation

Paul: Well, you might try accidentally breaking something valuable of hers, say her比如说她的-

accidentally adv.偶然地, 意外地

Monica: -leg?

Paul: (laughing) That's one way! Me, I- I went for the watch.

went for v.攻击,尽力想求得

Monica: You actually broke her watch? 

[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is talking on the phone and pacing.]

pace vi.踱步

Rachel: Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju- (She stops talking and dials the phone.) Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway..

cut off 切断/HI, the machine cut me off again: disconnect, terminate, and shut off

[Scene: Ross's Apartment; Ross is pacing while Joey and Chandler are working on some more furniture.]

Chandler: Look, Ross, you gotta understand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento.

Mento：Mento是曼妥思糖(Mentos)的简称。在钱德勒和乔伊安慰离婚的罗斯时，钱德勒说他和乔伊与女孩的关系从来没有“长过嚼一颗曼妥思糖的时间(lasted longer than a Mento)”；以劝慰罗斯放开一点。在<我与老友一起傻笑>一书中也有提到：Here Chandler made a comparison of the longevity of his and Joey's relationship to the lasting of Mento,emphasizing the shortness of their relationship with other girls,which acts kinda as a comfort to Ross.

Ross: You know what the scariest part最糟的部分is? What if there's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that's it? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...

你们知道最可怕的是什么？要是每个人只能有一个女人？我是说，要是你找到一个女人（做另一半）－然后就不能在找了？不幸的是，我这件事里，那个一个女人是给“她”准备的..

Joey: What are you talking about? 'One woman'? That's like saying there's only one flavor口味of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something, Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough制甜酥饼干面团, and Bing! Cherry Vanilla樱桃香草. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts核果, or whipped cream生奶油! This is the best thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight? Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!

you were, like, what, eight是8岁的意思?

jimmies是一种经常撒在ice cream上的巧克力味的小糖果棒。bing就是一个拟声词。

Grab a spoon：因为joey把女人比喻成冰激凌嘛,他让ross拿起勺子去尝冰激淋,就是比喻他去找新目标了

Ross: I honestly don't know我真的不知道if I'm hungry or horny.

horny adj. adj.a.角状的b.欲火焚身的/I honestly don?t know if I?m hungry or horny: feeling great sexual desire

Chandler: Stay out of my freezer! freezer n.冰箱

[Scene: A Restaurant, Monica and Paul are still eating.]

Paul: Ever since she walked out on me, I, uh...

walk out v.走出, 退席, 罢工, 把(某人)带走/walk out on me甩了我

Monica: What?..... What, you wanna spell it out with noodles?

spell out v.讲清楚, 清楚地说明/ever since she walked out on me, I uh, what? What, you wanna spell it out with noodles? : Abandon, run out on; make explicit.

Paul: No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kinda revelation(n.告白，显示，揭露) 这该是第五次约会时候才说的事儿.

Monica: Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?

Paul: Isn't there?

Monica: Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What were you gonna say你刚才想说什么?

Paul: Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um, I haven't been able to, uh, perform. (Monica takes a sip（n.吸吮）of her drink.) ...Sexually.

perform sexually=have a sex

Monica: (spitting out her drink in shock) Oh God, oh God, I am sorry... I am so sorry...

spit out v.吐出

Paul: It's okay...

Monica: I know being spit on is probably not what you need right now. Um... how long?

Paul: Two years.

Monica: Wow! I'm-I'm-I'm glad you smashed her watch!

Paul: So you still think you, um... might want that fifth date?

Monica: (pause)...Yeah. Yeah, I do.

[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is watching Joanne Loves Chaci.]

Priest on TV: We are gathered here today to join Joanne Louise Cunningham and Charles, Chachi-Chachi-Chachi, Arcola in the bound of holy matrimony神圣的婚姻.

in bound of holy matrimony：结为夫妇，在神圣婚姻的约束，范围内

Rachel: Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference!

Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That's the difference! ：What Rachel said is funny is because Rachel here was sarcastic about her running away from altar.She was deeply moved by the true love between Joanne and Chachi which leads to a successful holy matrimony,while she and Barry had almost everything but love and that results in her disappointment in their matrimony.So she felt right to have escaped from a doomed marrige with a person she would never love.

[Scene: Ross's Apartment, they're all sitting around and talking.]

Ross: (scornful) Grab a spoon. Do you know how long it's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anything to you?

Billy don't be a hero 这是一首著名的７０年代反战歌曲，描写的是越战中，一个女孩希望自己的fiance Billy平安归来，don't be a hero in the war,但最后Billy还是在战争中失去了他年青的生命．歌中有一句词说：“比利，不要成为一个英雄(Billy，don't be a hero)”。回来，让我成为你的妻子。在剧中，乔伊劝告罗斯忘记前妻卡罗尔，再找新的女友，罗斯非常不满，他反问乔伊：那“比利，不要成为一个英雄”这个故事对你有何启发?这里罗斯把找新女友比喻成上战场/Do the words? Billy, don?t be a hero? mean anything to you? : A hit(n.歌曲) by Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods in 1974, written about a young man named Billy who headed to Vietnam War and had to leave his lovely fiancée(n.<法>未婚妻). Here, I assume, Ross likens it to(与……相比) his tragic love affair in a sappy(adj.精力充沛的,易动感情的) manner, you know, his wife is a lesbian

Ross: Y'know, here's the thing是这样的. Even if I could get it together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? (He gazes out of the window.)

gaze out向外注视/you know, here is the thing even if I could get it together enough to –to ask a woman out, who am I gonna ask? : This idiom means succeed in controlling your feelings [Cut to Rachel staring out of her window.]

Commercial Break

[Scene: Monica's Apartment, Rachel is making coffee for Joey and Chandler.]

Rachel: Isn't this amazing? I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life.

Chandler: That is amazing.

Joey: Congratulations.

Rachel: Y'know, I figure if I can make coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.

Chandler: If can invade Poland, there isn't anything I can't do.

Joey: Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feel like you gotta make like a Western omelet or something... (Joey and Chandler taste the coffee, grimace, and pour it into a plant pot.) Although actually I'm really not that hungry...

on a roll: undergoing or experiencing sustained, even increasing good fortune or success (手风较顺) 一次连着做什么事情，发兴or做事情很成功。/grimace vi.扮鬼脸, 作苦相/ plant pot 花盆/listen, while you are on a roll: Undergoing or experiencing sustained, even increasing good fortune or success

western omelet（西式煎蛋）很棒，是用火腿片、切碎的青椒、洋葱片撒在摊开的蛋上，用平底锅放在小火上烤出来的

Monica: (entering, to herself) Oh good, Lenny and Squigy are here.

连续剧Laverne and Shirley里的两个角色.她们是很好的朋友，室友，工友（在一家酿酒厂做封瓶盖的工作）/oh, good, Lenny and Squigy are here : Lenny and Squigy are two obnoxious(adj.讨厌的,不愉快的) characters in American Comedy Laverne & Shirley (mind you,this sitcom will also be mentioned by Ross in episode116); Laverne & Shirley are two girls both working as  bottle cappers(n.装盖人), while Lenny and Squigy are their upstairs neighbors who always make the move on(调戏) the girls. In this scene, when Monica steps into the apartment,nobody but Rachel, Chandler and Joey there, so you know what Monica means!

All: Morning. Good morning.

Paul: (entering from Monica's room) Morning.

Joey: Morning, Paul.

Rachel: Hello, Paul.

Chandler: Hi, Paul, is it?

(Monica and Paul walk to the door and talk in a low voice so the others can't hear.  The others move Monica's table closer to the door so that they can.)

Paul: Thank you!  Thank you so much!

Monica: Stop!

Paul: No, I'm telling you last night was like umm, all my birthdays, both graduations, plus the barn raising scene in Witness.

barn raising: 村里的一种庆典，当一家人要建个新农屋时，邻居们也一起过来帮忙凑热闹，场面很喜庆。/Barn raising scene in Witness 哈里森，福特主演的《目击者(Witness)》一片中，被迫杀的警察布克为了逃脱敌人而被迫躲在农村，宁静的乡村生活中大家合力盖谷仓的场景是电影中层现快乐生活的精彩片断。在《老友记》剧中，刚和莫尼卡共度良宵的保罗为了形容他的快感，说和莫尼卡做爱要超过“所有生日、两次毕业典礼再加上《目击者》电影里合力盖起谷仓那种快乐”/no,I?m telling you last night was like umm, all my birthdays both graduations, plus the barn raising scene in Witness : Barn raising is an Amish tradition in which members of the community come together to build a barn(n.农仓) for a member of the community; Witness is a movie where Hollywood legendary(adj.传说的) Harrison Ford starred as a detective to protect an Amish child called “witness”. (here I suppose Paul maneuvered a good example to portray(v.描绘) the ecstasy(n.入迷) about his love affair with Monica , while fawned Monica that

he was also interested in Amish culture at the same time. (Monica似乎对Amish的文化情有独钟这在Marcel gets away & Fake Monica这二集里都有暗示,如果大家对AMISH想多点了解) Monica: We'll talk later.

Paul: Yeah. (They kiss) Thank you. (Exits)

Joey: That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do you do on a real date?

Monica: Shut up, and put my table back.

All: Okayyy! (They do so.)

Chandler: All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If I don't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference没什么区别...

Rachel: So, like, you guys all have jobs?

Monica: Yeah, we all have jobs. See, that's how we buy stuff.

Joey: Yeah, I'm an actor.

Rachel: Wow! Would I have seen you in anything?

Joey: I doubt it. Mostly regional work.

wow, would I have seen you in anything, I doubt it, mostly regional work.: consider unlikely(adj.不太可能的)

Monica: Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the Reruns' production of Pinocchio.

rerun n.重播

Pinocchio:Geppetto 这就是大家耳熟能详的木偶皮诺曹和他的制造者、老木匠葛佩托。剧中，这是乔伊曾经出演过的剧目。/Pinocchio和Geppetto 从小耳熟能详的《木偶奇遇记》，英文就叫做Pinocchio，这也是“小木偶”的名字，而造出它的老木匠则叫做Geppetto。当小木偶经历种种冒险，最终变成一个真人，他就兴奋地跟老木匠说：Look, Geppetto, I'm a real live boy.这里Chandler就是故意拿这句话讽刺Joey一个大男人，演的却是小木偶，可见他根本没什么演艺代表作品。/oh, wait, wait, unless you happened to catch the rerun?s production of Pinocchio, at the little theater in the park… look, Gippetto, I?m a real live boy. I will not take this abuse: haha, adventure of Pinocchio, betcha(=bet you) you know!;Gippetto is the old carpenter who creates Pinocchio, when the wooden structure is done, the first words said by Pinocchio are “I?m a real live boy!”; take abuse means you recoil(vi.畏缩) as to someone else?s language offense(n.进攻)

Joey: Look, it was a job all right?

Chandler: 'Look, Gippetto, I'm a real live boy.'

Joey: I will not take this abuse(n.v.滥用)别这样羞辱我. (Walks to the door and opens it to leave.)

Chandler: You're right, I'm sorry. (Burst into song and dances out of the door.) "Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..."

Monica: So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay? Talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.

Rachel: I can see that. You look like you slept with a hanger（n.衣架）in your mouth.

因为monica笑个不停，和不上嘴，rachel就说她好像嘴里有一个衣架把嘴撑住了

Monica: I know, he's just so, so... Do you remember you and Tony DeMarco?

Rachel: Oh, yeah.

Monica: Well, it's like that. With feelings.

Rachel: Oh wow. Are you in trouble.

Monica: Big time!

Rachel: Want a wedding dress?   Hardly used.

Monica: Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to work and not think about him all day. Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work.

Rachel: Oh, look, wish me luck!

Monica: What for?=for what为什么？

Rachel: I'm gonna go get one of those (Thinks) job things.

(Monica exits.)

[Scene: Iridium, Monica is working as Frannie enters.]

Frannie: Hey, Monica!

Monica: Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida?

Frannie: You had sex, didn't you?

Monica: How do you do that?

Frannie:  So? Who?

Monica: You know Paul?

Frannie: Oh yeah, I know Paul.

Monica: You mean you know Paul like I know Paul?

Frannie: Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul我给Paul打保票. Y'know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years.

take credit for因...而得到好评/ turle n.海龟/there was no snap in his turtle for two years.

The "snap in his turtle" refers to sexual performance, it's kind of a "clean" way of saying a vulgar idea (also known as a euphemism). A man who has no snap in his turtle is impotent; or, unable to have an erection.

I do have an idea on how it was created. "Snap," of course, has many meanings, but most of them have to do with making a quick, sudden movement (or sound), often of a closing or biting nature. In North America, there is an animal known as a "snapping turtle," which is a type of turtle that is known to bite (or "snap") humans and other animals. From what I have heard, if one of those things bites you, it hurts a lot. Now, if one of these turtles can't snap, then there's not so much to fear--if they can't bite you, they can't hurt you. A snapping turtle with no (abilty to) snap, then, is powerless, and from there the slang was created. The word "impotent," aside from its sexual definition, also means "without power." In the case of "Friends," they decided to use the word "turtle" in this way, and so a turtle without "snap" is understood by Franny and Monica to mean a man without (sexual) power or capability. /are you kidding? I take credit for Paul, you know before me, there was no snap in his turtle for two years. : if A takes credit for B,that means B is indebted to(负债的,感激的) A; here snap means vigor(n.精力,活力), while turtle is a vulgar expression to refer to male?s genitalia ,i.e. penis or peepee

[Scene: Central Perk, everyone but Rachel is there.]

Joey: (sitting on the arm of the couch)Of course it was a line!

line: 谎言。

老美最讨厌的就是liar。

line有“台词”的意思，在加上这句话是joey说的，他是个演员，所以我认为这里的line 是台词的意思，而不是谎言。

Friends的编剧文字功底醇厚，用词也常常叫人拍案叫绝。这里的line就是一例。不仅复合joey的“actor”身份，词本身用在这里也是恰到好处。

Line一词也可作为俚语解释，字意为：“one's usual way of talking, esp when being persuasive or self-aggran dizing”,这不正是"the wine guy" Paul的狐狸真面目（as ross said, to get

women to go to bed by acting patheticly）？

A line is a phrase tend to say to several people. It's a phrase designed to get what they want. Sometimes people have a line they use to get girls and it's called a "pick-up line." people also have lines they might use if they are businessmen and want you to buy something. it's not always a lie but it's almost always some exaggeration.

About LINE

今天读Erich Segal的小说Man, Woman and Child外研社?88年版时，在119页遇到这个词在相同情形下的用法。

In a restaurant

Gavin: … And I hope you?ll accept my invitation for nightcap, without any superfluous qualms.

Sheila: No, really, I can?t. My friends are expecting me.

Gavin: The Hotel is midway between there and here.

His Hot el. What a line! Did he ever actually succeed with it? Of course he did. …… (Sheila) 注释为：What a line! 手法真不高明！line指为达到某种目的而采取的手段或花言巧语。可以参考。/of course, it was a line: glib(adj.油腔滑调的) or insincere(adj.不真诚的) talk, usually intended to deceive or impress

Monica: Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that?

Ross: I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than 'to get you into bed'.

sophisticated：在中文里面是世故的意思，其实在英文里面，这个单词是褒义词，说明人非常成熟有魅力。

Monica: Is it me? Is it like I have some sort of beacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear?

beacon n.灯塔，烟火to 气味

Phoebe: All right, c'mere, gimme your feet. (She starts massaging them.)

Monica: I just thought he was nice, y'know?

Joey: (bursts out laughing again) I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!

(Monica pushes him off of the sofa as Rachel enters with a shopping bag.)

Rachel: Guess what?

Ross: You got a job?

Rachel: Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing书都白念了! I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.

I was laughed out of twelve interviews today. 这里laughed out of : 是Rachel面试表现太差，太出糗，被轰笑出了面试官的办公室。

Chandler: And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.

upbeat adj.乐观的, 欢乐的/and yet you are surprisingly upbeat: cheerful, optimistic

Rachel: You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fifty percent off打了5折!

Chandler: Oh, how well you know me...

Rachel: They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots!

Monica: How'd you pay for them?

Rachel: Uh, credit card.

Monica: And who pays for that?

Rachel: Um... my... father.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, everyone is sitting around the kitchen table.   Rachel's credit cards are spread out on the table along with a pair of scissors.]

spread out展开

Monica: C'mon, you can't live off your parents your whole life.

live off v.住在...外, 靠...生活/you can?t live off your parents you whole life: if you live off someone that is where you get the money that you need.

Rachel: I know that. That's why I was getting married.

Phoebe: Give her a break饶了她吧, it's hard being on your own for the first time.

be on your own独立生活

Rachel: Thank you.

Phoebe: You're welcome. I remember when I first came to this city. I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison, and I got here, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like, cleaning windshields outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I found aromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel.

step-dad n.继父/albino n.白化病者/ windshield n.挡风玻璃/port authority港务局/aromatherapy n.用香料按摩/aromatic adj.芬芳的/and I ended up living with this albino guy who…: end up means finally be or do somethin g; deficient(adj.不足的) pigmentation(n.色素沉着) (Pause)

Ross: The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'...

Monica: All right, you ready?

Rachel: No.  No, no, I'm not ready!  How can I be ready?  "Hey, Rach!  You ready to jump out the airplane without your parachute?"  Come on, I can't do this!

Monica: You can, I know you can!

Rachel: I don't think so.

Ross: Come on, you made coffee!   You can do anything! (Chandler slowly tries to hide the now dead plant from that morning when he and Joey poured their coffee into it.) Ross: C'mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,...

All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... (She cuts one of them and they cheer.)

Rachel: Y'know what?  I think we can just leave it at that.  It's kinda like a symbolic gesture...

Monica:  Rachel!  That was a library card!

All: Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut..

Chandler: (as Rachel is cutting up her cards) Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream.

(She finishes cutting them up and they all cheer.)

Monica: Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You're gonna love it!

it sucks 这不容易，这很残酷or（尽管）这个世界很恶心。

[Time Lapse, Rachel and Ross are watching a TV channel finishes it's broadcast day by playing the national anthem.]

the national anthem n.国歌

Monica: Well, that's it (To Ross) You gonna crash on the couch你想睡在沙发上吗?

crash: v.临时在哪儿凑合一觉。/you gonna crash on the couch? : To temporarily stay over or sleep at a place other  than  at  one's  own  usual  abode(n.住处),  (while crash also means occupy usually uninvited in Idiom such as crash the party, which you will meet in later episode)

Ross: No. No, I gotta go home sometime.

Monica: You be okay?

Ross: Yeah.

Rachel: Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor. (Monica smiles.) What?

Monica: That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy. Alright. Goodnight, everybody.

Ross and Rachel: Goodnight.

(Monica stomps on Paul's watch and goes into her room.)

stomp n.v.跺, 践踏, 重踏/you just put back where you found it, Monica stomps on Paul?s  watch: smash something by foot

Ross: Mmm. (They both reach for the last cookie) Oh, no-

reach for v.伸手拿东西

Rachel: Sorry-

Ross: No no no, go-

Rachel: No, you have it, really, I don't want it-

Ross: Split it?

Rachel: Okay.

Ross: Okay. (They split it.) You know you probably didn't know this, but back in high school, I had a, um, major crush on you.

crush vt.压碎, 碾碎, 压服/have a crush on sb.对某人一见钟情，Ross在这里加上了major,意思是非常喜欢的意思。

这儿ROSS说他是a crush on RACH, 意思是他“曾暗恋过”RACH，往往有一种事过境迁后的自嘲味道在里面，说“一见钟情”是不太准确的。如果你现在对你喜欢的人说“i have a crush on you”，嘿嘿，说不定他/她会理解成：“噢，原来你曾经一度呆傻般地迷恋上俺，不过现在已经不把俺当回事了。即：if you are a crush on someone, you are in love with them but do not have a relationship with them./split it? O.K. I had a major crush on you: an intense and usually passing infatuation.(n.迷恋)

Rachel: I knew.

Ross: You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geeky older brother.

geeky adj.<俚>令人讨厌的

Rachel: I did.

Ross: Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerability become any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out? Sometime? Maybe?

intense vulnerablility 强烈的脆弱感

Rachel: Yeah, maybe...

Ross: Okay... okay, maybe I will...

Rachel: Goodnight.

Ross: Goodnight.

(Rachel goes into her room and Monica enters the living room as Ross is leaving.)

Monica: See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you?

Ross: I just grabbed a spoon. (Ross exits and Monica has no idea what that means.)

Closing Credits

[Scene: Central Perk, everyone is there.]

Joey: I can't believe what I'm hearing here.

Phoebe: (sings) I can't believe what I'm hearing here...

Monica: What? I-I said you had a-

Phoebe: (sings) What I said you had...

Monica: (to Phoebe) Would you stop?

Phoebe: Oh, was I doing it again?

All: Yes!

Monica: I said that you had a nice butt, it's just not a great butt.

Joey: Oh, you wouldn't know a great butt if it came up and bit ya.

Ross: There's an image.

Rachel: (walks up with a pot of coffee) Would anybody like more coffee?

Chandler: Did you make it, or are you just serving it?

Rachel: I'm just serving it.

All: Yeah. Yeah, I'll have a cup of coffee.

Chandler: Kids, new dream... I'm in Las Vegas. (Rachel sits down to hear Chandler's dream.) Customer: (To Rachel) Ahh, miss?   More coffee?

Rachel: Ugh. (To another customer that's leaving.) Excuse me, could you give this to that guy over there? (Hands him the coffee pot.) Go ahead. (He does so.) Thank you. (To the gang.) Sorry.  Okay, Las Vegas.

Chandler: Okay, so, I'm in Las Vegas... I'm Liza Minelli-

Liza Minelli(A famous singer used to be a duet-mate of Pavarotti.) 该集最后一个场景，钱德勒再次提到他做的梦，他梦见自己是“丽莎米内利(Liza Minelli)”。丽莎是名演员、曾主演《绿野仙踪》的裘迪迦伦的女儿，本人也于1 9 7 3年因为在《小酒馆(Cabaret)》一片中的精彩演出而获得奥斯卡最佳女主角奖。/i?m  in  Las  Vegas,  I?m  Liza  Minelli:  a  legendary(adj.传奇式的) actress  who  won  Tony awards and Oscars for her contributions to the TV and Movie career.

101 试播

没什么好说的！

他不过是我的同事！

少来了，你和那个人一起出去！

拜托，和你交往的男人一定有问题！

打住，乔伊，嘴下留德。

他驼背？既驼背又带假发？

慢着，他吃粉笔吗？

我只是不想你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙。

各位别急，

这不算约会。

我们不过是出去吃晚餐，而且

不做爱。

听起来好像是说我的约会。

记得中学时代的梦，

我站在自助餐厅，

突然发现自己全身赤裸。

我做过那样的梦。

我低头一看，

看见有一支电话……

在那儿。

而不是……？

没错。

我没做过那样的梦,没有。

那支电话突然响起，

而我不知道怎么办，

每个人都开始望着我。

他们以前不看你吗？！

终于，我认为我应该接，

结果是我妈打来，

我感到很奇怪，

因为我妈不曾打过电话给我！

嗨。

这家伙向我打招呼时我就想自杀。

你还好吧？

我感觉有人把手伸入我的喉咙

抓起我的肠子，

从我的口中取出，

然后绑在我脖子上……

饼干？

卡罗今天把她的东西搬走了。

- 我帮你泡杯咖啡，

谢了。

不要……别清理我的灵气。

可是……别碰我的灵气就是了。

好吧，保持晦气！

我会没事的，真的，我祝她幸福。

- 不，你不会的，没错，

- 我不会的，去她的，她甩掉我！

而且你一直都不知道她是女同性恋者。没有！！行了吧？！

为何大家都围着这个话题打转？

连她不知道，我怎会知道。

有时真希望自己也是个女同志。

我刚刚大声说出来了吗？

昨晚我告诉我父母，

他们好像还挺好。

真的吗，凌晨三点我接到一个电话，

一个女人歇斯底里的向我哭诉，

“我不能抱孙子了，

我不能抱孙子了。”

那是什么？打错了？

对不起。

别闷闷不乐了，罗斯。

你现在很痛苦。

我一肚子火,心如刀割。

我能告诉你解决之道吗？

脱衣舞酒店。

你单身，有性需求。

我不想单身的。

我只想再结婚。

我只想要一百万！

- 瑞秋？！

- 天啊，莫妮卡，谢天谢地！

我到过你的住处，你不在。

有个拿着一根大榔头的人说你可能会在这儿，结果你真的在这儿。

想来杯咖啡吗？

无咖啡因的。

各位，她叫瑞秋，

另一位从林肯高中生存下来的人。

这位叫钱德勒，

菲比，乔伊。

还记得我哥罗斯吗？

当然。

嗨。

你想现在告诉我们，

还是等伴娘来再说？

婚礼前半个小时发生了变数。

我在堆放礼物的房间里，

看着船形卤肉盘，

非常漂后的船形卤肉盘，

突然间……

有没有代糖？

我了解船形卤肉盘此巴瑞更能引起我的“性趣”我自己都吓了一跳，

巴瑞愈看愈像猪头先生。

我一直都认为他很眼熟。

总之,我必须离开。

我开始想，

我为何这么做？

我为谁这样做？

于是我不知该走往何处，

我知道你我日渐疏远。

但是你是我在这个城市，

认识的唯一一个人。

好像是唯一没受邀参加婚礼的人。

这件事就甭提啦。

我猜他送她一台管风琴，

她肯定不喜欢，

金枪鱼还是鸡蛋沙拉？快决定！

我要拥有克莉丝汀拥有的一切。

爸，我不能嫁给他……

对不起，我只是不爱他。

对，是我的问题！

如果我没了头发，

还不如去死。

她不该穿那条裤子。

我建议推她下楼，

推她下楼！

推她下楼！

推她下楼！

爸，你听我说……

大家这样评价我这一辈子：

你是一只鞋……

今天我倒想看看如果我不再是鞋会怎样。我说如果我想当皮包呢？

或是帽子呢？

不，我不需你帮我买帽子。

我说我是一顶帽子。

爸，这是一种比喻。

你看他也有些问题。

爸，这是我的人生。

或许我会和莫妮卡住在这儿。

我想我们已确定好谁要和莫妮卡住在这儿。或许那是我的决定。

或许我不希罕你的钱。

等一下，等一下……我说的是或许！！

深呼吸，就这样。

试着想着美好的事物……

玫瑰上的雨滴，

猫嘴上的胡须，

门铃和雪橇之类的。

啦啦啦……

还有手套……