TED英语演讲：这才是爱情应有的样子

TED英语演讲：这才是爱情应有的样子

今天为大家收集整理了关于TED英语演讲：这才是爱情应有的样子,希望大家会喜欢,同时也希望给你们带来一些参考的作用!

A better way to talk about love

OK, so today I want to talk about how wetalk about love. And specifically, I want to talk about what's wrong with howwe talk about love.

今天我想谈谈我们是如何谈论爱情的。我尤其想和你们聊的是，我们谈论爱情时到底哪里出错了。

Most of us will probably fall in love a fewtimes over the course of our lives, and in the English language, this metaphor,falling, is really the main way that we talk about that experience. I don'tknow about you, but when I conceptualize this metaphor, what I picture isstraight out of a cartoon — like there's a man, he's walking down the sidewalk, withoutrealizing it, he crosses over an open manhole, and he just plummets into thesewer below. And I picture it this way because falling is not jumping. Fallingis accidental, it's uncontrollable. It's something that happens to us withoutour consent. And this — this is the main way

we talk about starting a new relationship.

我们大多数人在一生中可能深爱过几次，在英语中，坠入爱河这个比喻，是我们谈论这段经历的主要方式。我不知道你是怎么想的，但是当我把这个比喻概念化的时候，我脑海里浮现的是一幅漫画——就像有一个人，他走在人行道上，没有意识到自己走过一个打开的井盖，然后他就一头栽进下面的下水道里。我会这么想是因为，坠落不是跳跃。坠落是偶然的，是无法控制的。是没经过我们的同意就发生了，而这我们说到开始一段新的感情，主要就用的这种方式去表达的。

I am a writer and I'm also an Englishteacher, which means I think about words for a living. You could say that I getpaid to argue that the language we use matters, and I would like to argue thatmany of the metaphors we use to talk about love — maybe even most ofthem — are a problem.

我是一名作家，同时也是一位英语老师，这就意味着我以思考语言为生。你可能会说，我们使用的语言很重要，我认为我们用来谈论爱情的许多隐喻——甚至可能是其中的大多数都是有问题的。

So, in love, we fall. We're struck. We arecrushed. We swoon. We burn with passion. Love makes us crazy,

and it makes ussick. Our hearts ache, and then they break. So our metaphors equate theexperience of loving someone to extreme violence or illness.

于是，我们坠入爱河。我们被击溃。我们意乱情迷。爱让我们疯狂，也让我们难受不已。我们的心会痛，会心碎。所以我们把深爱某人比喻为与极端暴力和疾病相关的比喻。

They do. And they position us as thevictims of unforeseen and totally unavoidable favorite one ofthese is "smitten," which is the past participle of the word"smite." And if you look this word up in the dictionary —you will seethat it can be defined as both "grievous affliction," and, "tobe very much in love."

I tend to associate the word "smite" witha very particular context, which is the Old Testament. In the Book of Exodusalone, there are 16 references to smiting, which is the word that the Bibleuses for the vengeance of an angry God.

确实是这样的。这些比喻把我们看作在不可预见和完全不可避免的情况的受害者。我最喜欢的一个是smitten，它是smite的过去分词如果你在字典里查这个词你会发现它既可以被定义为“极度痛苦”，也可以被定义为“神魂颠倒”。我倾向于把"smite"这个词和一个非常特殊的语境联系起来，

那就是《旧约》。仅在《出埃及记》中，就有16处提到了smiting，这是圣经中用来描述愤怒的上帝复仇的词。

(Laughter)

Here we are using the same word to talkabout love that we use to explain a plague of So, how did thishappen How have we come to associate love with great pain and sufferingAndwhy do we talk about this ostensibly good experience as if we are victimsThese are difficult questions, but I have some theories. And to think thisthrough, I want to focus on one metaphor in particular, which is the idea oflove as madness.

我们谈论爱情时所使用的词语和我们用来解释蝗虫的瘟疫所用的词语是同一个。对吧那么，怎么会这样呢我们是为什么会把爱和巨大的痛苦联系在一起呢为什么我们谈论这种看似美好的经历时将自己看做受害者呢这些问题很难回答，但我有一些理论。为了深入思考这个问题，我想特别关注一个比喻，那就是爱是疯狂的想法。

When I first started researching romanticlove, I found these madness metaphors everywhere. The history of Westernculture is full of language that equates love to mental illness. These are justa few examples. William Shakespeare: "Love is merely a madness,"

from"As You Like It."Friedrich Nietzsche: "There is always somemadness in love." "Got me looking, got me looking so crazy in love — "fromthe great philosopher, Beyoncé Knowles.

当我第一次开始研究浪漫爱情时，我发现这些疯狂的隐喻无处不在。西方文化史上充满了将爱情等同于精神疾病的语言。这只是几个例子。莎士比亚:“爱只不过是一种疯狂”，出自《皆大欢喜》。尼采:“爱情总有疯狂的时刻。”伟大的哲学家碧昂丝·诺尔斯曾说过:“让我看起来疯狂，像是爱疯了”

I fell in love for the first time when Iwas 20, and it was a pretty turbulent relationship right from the start. And itwas long distance for the first couple of years, so for me that meant very highhighs and very low lows. I can remember one moment in particular. I was sittingon a bed in a hostel in South America, and I was watching the person I lovewalk out the door. And it was late, it was nearly midnight, we'd gotten into anargument over dinner, and when we got back to our room, he threw his things inthe bag and stormed out. While I can no longer remember what that argument wasabout, I very clearly remember how I felt watching him leave.

我第一次坠入爱河是在我20岁的时候，从一开始这段关系就跌宕起伏。在最初的几年里，我们处于异地恋的状态，所以对我来说，这意味着要么极度幸福要么极度痛苦。我能特别记得那一刻，我坐在南美一家旅社的床上，看着我爱的夺门而出。已经很晚了，将近午夜了，我们在吃晚饭的时候发生了争吵，当我们回到房间时，他把他的东西扔进包里，气冲冲地走了。虽然我已经不记得我们当时因为什么在争吵了，但我非常清楚地记得看着他离开时我的感受。

I was 22, it was my first time in thedeveloping world, and I was totally alone. I had another week until my flighthome, and I knew the name of the town that I was in, and the name of the citythat I needed to get to to fly out, but I had no idea how to get around. I hadno guidebook and very little money, and I spoke no Spanish.

那时我22岁，这是我第一次来到发展家，我孤身一人。还有一个星期我才能飞回家，我知道我要去的城镇的名字，也知道我要飞到的城市的名字，但是我不知道该怎么走。我没有旅游指南，也没有多少钱，而且我不会说西班牙语。

Someone more adventurous than me might haveseen this as a moment of opportunity, but I just froze. I just sat there. Andthen I burst into tears. But despite

my panic, some small voice in my headthought, "Wow. That was dramatic. I must really be doing this love thingright."

一些比我更有冒险精神的人可能会把这看作是一个机遇，但我却愣住了。我只是坐在那里。然后我泪流满面。尽管我很恐慌，但我脑子里还是有个很小的声音在想:“哇!这是很戏剧性的，我真的爱上这个人了!”

Because some part of me wanted to feelmiserable in love. And it sounds so strange to me now, but at 22, I longed tohave dramatic experiences, and in that moment, I was irrational and furious anddevastated, and weirdly enough, I thought that this somehow legitimized thefeelings I had for the guy who had just left me.

因为我在这一刻想要被爱折磨，现在听起来很奇怪，但在我22岁的时候，我渴望有戏剧性的经历，在那一刻，我失去理智，愤怒和崩溃，奇怪的是，我认为这在某种程度上，我对那个刚摔门而去的我的男人产生这样的感情是合理的。

I think on some level I wanted to feel alittle bit crazy, because I thought that that was how loved worked. This reallyshould not be surprising, considering that according to Wikipedia, there areeight films, 14 songs, two albums and one novel with the title "CrazyLove."