【英语学习资料】老友记字幕Word版第一季第十四集

告诉你吧罗斯她想要你

Telling you, Ross, she wants you.

她几乎不认识我我们只是住在同一栋公寓

She barely knows me. We just live in the same building. -有过任何接触 -她借过我一颗蛋

- Any contact? - She lent me an egg.

-有机会了 -可不是

- You're in! - Right.

-嗨罗斯 -嗨

- Hey, Ross. - Hey!

拜托罗斯你得重回情场

Come on. Ross, you got get back in the game.

你和瑞秋没戏

The Rachel thing isn't happening,

你前妻是个女同志

your ex-wife's a lesbian....

坏事不过三啊

I don't think we need a third.

打扰一下能给我们个蛋吗带壳的

Excuse me. Could we get an egg, still in the shell?

蛋

An egg?

对你拿这颗蛋给她并说

Yeah. You gonna go up to her and say,

"给你蛋我来还你的鸡蛋"

"Here's your egg back, I'm returning your egg."

我们赢定了

I think it's winning.

-拜托这太离谱了 -她会喜欢的

- It's insane. - She'll love it.

-谢谢 -谢谢给

-Thank you. -Thank you. Here.

朋友带着蛋去

Go with the egg, my friend.

快去快去

Go, go, go!

-你想会成功吗 -才怪这简直是自杀

- Think it'll work? - No way. It's suicide.

这男的还真有胆

The man's got an egg.

-你不能这样做 -做什么

- You can't do this. - Do what?

罗杰约她明晚出去

Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.

不菲比难道你忘了为何甩掉他

No! Pheebs, don't you remember why you dumped him? 因为他惹人厌

Because he was creepy.

卑鄙还有点可怕

And mean. And a little frightening.

但情人节有人共度也不差

Still, it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day!

可是菲比你哪一晚不都可以

But Phoebe, you can go out with a creepy guy

跟讨厌鬼出去么

any night of the year.

反正我是这样

I know I do.

你们明晚有何节目

What are you guys doing tomorrow night?

明天有何节目全看今天的表现

Actually tomorrow night kind of depends on how tonight goes. -关于今晚 -你不能抛下我

- About tonight - Don't ger your bail on me!

她答应跟我约会就是因为

The only reason she's goin' out with me

我答应给她朋友带一位男伴

is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.

我知道但她朋友好像是个十足的...

Yes I know, but her friend sounds like such a...

可怜虫我知道但是...

Pathetic mess. I know, but....

来吧兄弟她是如此渴望如此脆弱

Come on, man. She's needy, vulnerable.

我想...

I'm thinking....

谢谢

Thanks.

你和珍妮斯分手后就没约过会

You haven't been out with a woman since Janice. 你一定要去

You're doing this.

-她答应了 -干得好兄弟

- She said yes. - Way to go, man!

-蛋还在是吧 -对

- Still got the egg,huh? - Yeah.

我的样子如何

How do I look?

不关我的事

I don't care.

萝拉妮来了

There's Lorraine.

切记不准交换

Remember. No trading.

你有美女相伴我有挫女作陪

You get the pretty one, I get the mess.

Hi, Joey.

哎呦瞧你带的这位帅哥

Well, well! Look what you brought!

真不错

Very nice.

你带谁来

And what did you bring?

她在放外套

She's checking her coat.

乔伊我去洗掉手上的出租车味

Joey, I'm gonna wash the cab smell off of my hands. 你帮我点白葡萄酒珍妮斯喝红酒

Get me a white zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice. 珍妮斯...

Janice?

珍妮斯...

Janice!?

哦...

Oh...

... 我的...

...my...

...天哪

...God!

Hey, it's Janice!

我得逃了我要从窗子爬出去

Okay, I'm making a break for it! I'm going out through the window. 千万别我等了好久

No, no, no, I've been waiting for, like,

才能与萝拉妮约会

forever to go out with Lorraine.

-冷静点 -冷静

- Just calm down. - Calm down?

你竟给我撮合

You set me up with a woman

在五个月内被我甩掉两次的女人

I've dumped twice in the last five months!

别这么大声行吗你害我紧张得...

Can you stop yelling? You're making me nervous and....

我一紧张就尿不出来

I can't go when I'm nervous.

抱歉你说得对

I'm sorry, you're right.

拜托快点快点

Come on! Do it, do it!

罗杰虽讨人厌

Roger was creepy,

但他与皮特·康尼相比还差得远呢

but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney.

-谁是皮特·康尼 -爱哭鬼皮特

- Which one is Pete Carney? - Pete the Weeper.

记不记得我那个一做爱就哭的前男友

Remeber the guy that used to cry every time we had sex? "你满足吗"

"Was it good for you?"

我每天都想为霍尔那个好胜鬼哭

I'd take crying any day over Howard, the "I win" guy! "我赢了我赢了"

"I win! I win!"

我和他约会两个月一次都没爽过

We went out for two months. I didn't win once.

我们怎会和这些浑蛋在一起

How do we end up with these jerks?

-我们可是好人 -我也不清楚

- We are good people! - I don't know.

我们就像某种磁石

We're some kind of magnets.

我知道我是所以我不能戴电子表

I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch.

还有啤酒对吧

There's more beer, right?

记得我那剃光头的朋友艾比吗

You know my friend who shaves her head?

她说想要停止与恶男交往的恶性循环

She says to break the bad boyfriend cycle...

可以举行一个清理仪式

...you can do a cleansing ritual.

菲比她可是给自己剃了个秃头

Pheebs, this woman is voluntarily bald.

是的

Yeah.

我们明晚可以试试看

We can do it tomorrow night.

明天是情人节时刻正好

It's Valentine's Day. It's perfect.

好吧什么仪式

Okay, what kind of ritual?

我们可以烧掉他们送的东西

We can burn the stuff they gave us.

或者是

Or...?

或是念经并拿着权杖裸体跳舞

Or we can chant and dance around naked with sticks. 还是烧东西好

Burning's good.

知道吗

You know...

我从儿时起就能用脚趾夹起25美分

... ever since I was little, I can pick up quarters with my toes.

是吗真厉害

Yeah? Good for you.

硬币还是成卷的硬币

Quarters or rolls of quarters?

对了钱德勒我把照片上的你都剪掉了

By the way, Chandler, I cut you out of all of my pictures.

如果需要我有一袋你的头

So if you want, I have a bag with just your heads.

不用了

That's okay.

你确定吗你可以用它们做木偶

Are you sure, really? Because you could make little puppets out of them. 然后在你的"残酷戏院"中用到它们

And you could use them in your Theater of Cruelty!

不能这么做

We can't do that!

什么不能做什么

What? What can't you do?

能过去和你谈谈吗

Can I talk to you for a second? Over there?

我们可能得先走了

We might be leaving now.

告诉我"我们"是指你和我

Tell me it's you and me "we."

她说想在我身上涂满东西然后舔干净

She wants to slather my body with stuff and lick it off. 我都不太确定涂是什么意思

I'm not even sure what slathering is!

但我绝对不想错过

But I definitely want to be a part of it!

听着你不能这样对我

Okay, you cannot do this to me.

你说得对抱歉

You're right. I'm sorry.

三份巧克力慕斯外带谢谢

Can we have three chocolate mousses to go, please? 我要走了

I'm out of here.

这是我的信用卡这一顿算我的

Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me.

对不起钱德勒

I'm sorry, Chandler.

我希望她吐在你身上

I hope she throws up on you.

谢谢

Thanks.

-那就... -只剩下我们

- So.... - Just us.

真是糟糕的一夜

What a crappy night!

但我还是一直盯着

I have enjoyed the fact...

你拉链里露出来的衣服看得挺欢的

...that your shirt's been sticking out of your zipper. 抱歉

Excuse me.

你好吗

How you doing?

我们的朋友是不是天底下最好的

So do we have the best friends, or what?

乔伊哪称得上是朋友他...

Joey's not a friend. He's...

他是个留下信用卡的笨蛋

...a stupid man who left us his credit card.

想再来一杯吗甜点大银幕电视

Another drink? Dessert? A big-screen TV?

-我想再来一杯 -没问题好女人

- I'll have a drink. - Got it. Good woman!

-拿瓶要价最离谱的香槟来 -每人一瓶

- Could we get a bottle of your most overpriced champagne? -Each. 对每人一瓶再要瓶罗伯·罗伊威士忌

That's right, each. And a rob roy.

我老早就想品尝了

I've always wanted to know.

情人节快乐

Happy Valentine's Day!

我现在就开始想念你了

Oh, I miss you already.

-你能相信会发生这种事吗 -不能

- Can you believe this happened? - No, no!

但还是发生了

And yet it did.

-再见珍妮斯 -吻我

- Goodbye, Janice. - Kiss me!

钱德勒抱歉

Oh, Chandler. Sorry.

钱德不好意思啊

Oh, Chandler. Sorry!

-好啊珍妮斯 -嗨莫妮卡

- Hey, Janice. -Hi, Monica.

这场景真是难得一见

Well, this was very special.

瑞秋看看谁来了

Rach, come see who's out here!

怎么了天啊

What's going on? Oh, my God!

珍妮斯嗨

Janice! Hi!

珍妮斯就要走了

Janice is gonna go away now!

我马上回来

I'll be right back.

乔伊看谁来了

Joey! Look who it is!

很好乔伊回来了

Good. Joey's home.

这真是太好玩了

This is so much fun!

好像是大团圆一样

This is like a reunion in the hall!

罗斯对跟某人打个招呼吧

Ross, there's someone I want you to say hi to.

他恰好打电话来

He happened to call.

罗斯对是我你怎么会知道

Hi, Ross. That's right,it's me! How did you know?

我是说如果狗也会有时差问题

I'm just saying if dogs do its experience jet lag...

因为狗的七年等于人的一年

... because of the seven dog years to one human year thing... 那么狗从纽约飞到洛杉矶

...when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles...

损失的不是三小时而是一周半

... he doesn't just lose three hours,he loses a week and a half. 真有趣

That's funny!

她们是谁

Who are they?

金发的是我前妻

The blond is my ex-wife.

碰她的是她的...

And the woman touching her is her...

私人密友

...close, personal friend.

你是指她们是情人

You mean they're lovers?

如果你硬要这么说的话

If you want to put a label on it.

-我还需要知道什么 -不就这些了

- Anything else I should know? - Nope. That's it.

对了她怀了我的孩子

Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby.

我总是忘了这件事

I always forget that part.

我们需要鼠尾草和沙加缅度酒

Now we need sage branches and the sacramental wine.

我只有牛至叶和佛瑞斯加

All I had is oregano and a Fresca.

那样也行

That's okay!

现在我们需要正直男子的精液

Now we need the semen of a righteous man.

菲比你知道吗

Ok, Pheebs, you know what?

如果我们有这个仪式根本无需进行

If we had that, we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place. -可以丢东西了吗 -可以了丢吧

- Can we start throwing things in? - Yeah, okay!

巴瑞的信

Okay. Barry's letters.

亚当·瑞塔的四角裤

Adam Ritter's boxer shorts.

跟某人晚餐的收据

And I have the receipt from my dinner with....

-这是史考帝的裸体照片 -让我看看

- A picture of Scotty Jared naked! - Let me see!

-他穿着毛衣 -没有

- He's wearing a sweater. - No.

最后这是保罗的格拉巴酒

Okay, and here we have the last of Paolo's grappa. 等等这是不是纯的...

Wait, isn't it almost pure

我怎能在情人节甩掉她

How can I dump this woman on Valentine's Day? 我不晓得但你曾在新年甩掉她

I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.

下辈子我要当马桶刷

In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush. 你好风趣的情人

Hello, funny valentine!

嗨啥都不是的珍妮斯

Hi, just Janice.

你好乔伊我们的小丘比特

Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker.

我真想吻遍你全身上下这就开始

I could just kiss you all over, and I'm gonna.

如果你不敢就让我来开口

If you don't do it, I will.

所以你离开要去干什么吗

So are you, what do you for a leaving?

我是...

Well, you know, with..

不是吧我记得你说他们自己能拍的

Oh no. I thought you said they could shoot the spot without you. 我原以为他们可以

I thought they could.

-今天是情人节 -我知道但工作要紧

- It's Valentine's Day. - I know, but it's my job.

我会尽量赶回来抱歉

I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry.

我差不多一直在教自然科学

I'm spending most of my time teaching science...

真的很搞笑因为那都不是我的专业

...which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.

真好笑

Now, that is funny!

你觉得我邀卡罗尔过来

Do you think it would be too weird

会很奇怪吗

if I invited Carol over to join us?

因为她现在一个人怀孕了心情又不好

Because she's alone now. And pregnant. And sad.

-大概吧 -你确定卡罗尔

- I guess. - Are you sure? Carol!

-愿意过来坐吗 -不我没事

- Wanna join us? - No, I'm fine.

来吧这些人会挪过去的

Come on. These people will scooch down.

你们会挪过去的对吧

You guys will scooch, won't you?

各位挪过去好吗动起来

Let's try scooching! Come on!

-拜托 -谢谢

- Come on. - Thank you.

克莉丝汀这位是卡罗尔·威利克

IKristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick.

卡罗尔这是克莉丝汀

Carol, Kristen.

-你好 -卡罗尔教六年级

- How do you do? - Carol teaches sixth grade. 而克莉丝汀...

And Kristen....

克莉丝汀也有工作

Kristen does something...

最好笑的是

...that, funnily enough...

她的工作不是她的学的专业

...wasn't even her major!

里面有什么东西

What do we got there?

一条真丝四角内裤

A piece of sik boxer shorts.

问候卡

Some greeting cards.

烧掉一半的照片

A half-charred picture of....

这家伙的体毛比队长的还浓密

That guy's hairier than the chief!

这件事说来好笑

It's a really funny story how this happened.

没事没事你不必解释

It's all right. It's all right. You don't have to explain.

这不是第一件烧毁男友物品失控的事件了

This isn't the first boyfriend bonfire we've seen get out of control. -这已是今晚的第三件 -真的

- You are the third one tonight. - Really?

情人节之夜是我们最忙的时刻

Valentine's is our busiest night of the year.

-我带了东西给你 -上膛了没

- I brought you something. - Is it loaded?

心型糖果

Oh, little candy hearts.

"钱德勒与珍妮斯相爱到永远"

"Chan and Jan Forever."

我订做的

I had them made special.

好吧珍妮斯

Okay, Janice.

嗨珍妮斯

Hey, Janice.

我不该告诉你这些

There's no way to tell you this.

至少没有别的方法来告诉你

At least, there's no new way.

我只是觉得我们不会有结果

I just don't think things are gonna work out. 无所谓

That's fine.

是吗

It is?

因为我知道我们还没结束

Because I know that this isn't the end.

事实上已经结束了

You see, actually, it is.